“I know it’s no big deal,” my client said last week. “I should just shut it down and write.” She was talking about her perfectionism, which was once again attempting to hijack her writing process.
“Are you kidding?” I said, “It’s a huge deal!”
Think about the root of your perfectionism. For most of us, if we trace it back, we find this:
● A fear of not being loved.
● If I’m not perfect then I’m not worthy of love.
● I have to earn love.
● I’ll no longer be loved once people see how messed up/messy I am.
The possibility of having love withdrawn isn’t “no big deal” at all. In fact, for a helpless child (which thankfully we’re not any more), not being loved can literally mean the difference between living and dying.
Of course we become perfectionists, given how high the stakes are!
On the one hand, perfectionism serves you by keeping you safe and loved. It keeps you from having to get really vulnerable and from making too many mistakes.
On the other hand, it can cause you tremendous suffering, through your:
— Not being able to fully and honestly express yourself
— Being afraid
— Not wanting to hurt others’ feelings at the expense of your own
— Not trying new things
— Poor health
Today (June 3rd) we’re going to take a good look at your perfectionism. I’m going to offer you an antidote to begin to get out of that (very, very not fun!) cycle of perfectionism.
I’m going to tell you what we did that made my client text me the next day saying, “Thanks for yesterday, helped me tons and I ended up with writing I really like! I was able to write it because of the work we did!!
If you tired and fed up of the same cycle over and over, make a commitment to begin to break through and do things in a new way. Because there is a different — and I think, better — way.
Join us TODAY at Five Things That Are Keeping You Stuck:
We’ll be diving into —
1) That exhausting, deceptive, and painful quest for perfection
2) Those cruel and pesky Inner Critics
3) Why you’re editing your work at the completely wrong time
4) How to do creative work smarter instead of harder
5) Stop missing crucial body cues that inform your creativity
WHAT: Five Things That Are Keeping You Stuck
WHEN: Thursday, June 3rd ~ 11 am – 12pm MT / 8-9pm IT
COST: Free, but you must register
The replay will be available to registrants through the weekend, so be sure to register even if you can’t join live.